


I Drive Your Truck

by maderi



Series: Heartbeats of Lives Long Gone [1]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Ana Amari has a small part too, Farmer Gabe (or something), Gabriel suffering, M/M, Mentions of Hanzo Shimada - Freeform, Mentions of Jesse McCree, Mentions of suicide plans (but our good soldier spoils those plans, Old truck, Sickly unhappy Gabriel, hfn, so don't worry)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2017-04-09
Packaged: 2018-10-08 07:35:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10381722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maderi/pseuds/maderi
Summary: I drive your truck.....I hope you don't mind~~~~~~~~Or where Gabriel survived the explosion in Zurich. After his trial was done, he retired and moved back to Jack's farm in Indiana. Gabe is struggling with the guilt and remorse. He grieve in his own way, driving Jack's old truck to visit him.  Jack's body was never found; he was presumed dead and buried at Arlington.At the same time, the soldier 76 is raging war on the news channels.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I have rated this fic as Mature because of mentioned suicide plans from a hurting Gabe who can't take it anymore.  
> This is a HEA though, so no worries, but triggers are triggers, right? 
> 
> Anyway, this fic is based on Lee Brice's song; [I Drive Your Truck](watch)  
> I would advise you to listen to this song before you read the story :-) 
> 
>  
> 
> As always, all and every fault is mine and mine alone. 
> 
> One a side note, this is my first Overwatch fic. I do not play the game (cause right frankly, I suck at video games!) so I might not be all that about the right time frame and so on. But then again, this is an alternate universe seeing as Gabe retires instead of becoming the Reaper :-D

Gabriel clutched the worn keys in his hand, taking a deep breath as his heart threatened to beat right out of his chest.

He cast a sad glance over at the key’s owner; a beat up old blue and white pickup truck, parked by the barn.

Gabriel knew what he would find in the old thing once he unlocked the door and jumped in.

The ashtray still held a few cents, (eighty-nine to be exact), a half empty bottle of that god awful Gatorade that Jack secretly liked so much, rolling on the floorboard. Amazingly enough the fluids inside it still held an alarming shade of blue after all these years.

Jack's old dirty army cap on the dashboard, their SEP dog tags hanging from the rear view mirror and a ‘Go Army’ shirt folded in the back.

He stood there frozen, staring at the old piece of junk. The ranch hands passing by now and then, minding their own business, probably all too used to the sight of their boss spacing out like this when a memory hit him.

The first years had been hard on them, Jack’s parents, Gabe and his family. Gabriel had merely existed the first three years, not taking care of himself, the pain too much for him to do much more than sleep.

Jack’s parents had brought him and his family with them back to Indiana after Jack’s funeral and Gabe’s trial.

It had been hard for everyone. Jack’s parents and siblings mourning the loss of their son, his parents and siblings mourning the loss of their son in-law, of seeing Gabriel fall apart.

Gabe had simply just withered away, his muscles all but gone, hair and beard grown wild. He looked nothing more than a shadow of the proud and headstrong man he once was.

No one had known until he died, that Jack had been the power behind Gabriel Reyes.

Now they all knew.

*

Jesse and Hanzo had become the only sort of constant in Gabe’s life after Jack, visiting the farm whenever they could.

It was a somewhat comfort to see their Jesse so in love and happy, but at the same time, Gabe felt the small remains of his heart disappear like fog after every visit.

He missed Jack so much.

Regretted everything that had happened between them that last year before the explosion. The fighting, the jealousy, the hard and unforgiving words that he spat at Jack, just to hurt him.

And finally, the physical abuse. The physical abuse he inflicted on Jack out of sheer desperation and fear.

Gabriel bit his tongue as he remembered the first time he had hit Jack in anger, the only time.

 

_They were once again arguing about Blackwatch’s suspension. Gabe feeling betrayed and hurt above anything else._

_Jack had just stood there after Gabriel had landed a hard punch on his jaw, the skin immediately turning an ugly shade of purple._

_Every vein in Gabriel’s body had frozen, his heart exploding with pain, fear and regret._

_He hadn’t meant it!_

_‘Oh God, what had he just done?’_

_Jack wore the most impassive and empty expression Gabriel had ever seen on the other man._

_  
He'd been ready to fall to his knees, to beg Jack’s forgiveness when the other man looked at him and shook his head softly._

_  
“Alright.” Jack had said with a voice deprived of every and any emotion._

_  
Gabriel knew then and there that he had broken something important inside the younger man._

  
Jack remained where he was however.  
  
Unmoving.

  
Looking back, Gabriel knew he should have done something to mend their relationship, but instead he had furrowed his brows and hissed a cold ‘I hate you.’ at Jack before storming out of their shared quarters, not trusting himself to be alone with Jack.   
  
_The next day he had gathered the few items that didn't remind him of them and moved out, leaving a pale looking Jack behind him as he slammed the door._

_That had been his most drastic scream for help to the other man._

_But his call had been left unanswered._

_Or so he had thought._

 

After his trial was done, Ana had given him an envelope and told him to open it when he was ready. Telling him that she loved him and for him not to stay a stranger after his retirement.

Gabriel had held onto the envelope until their wedding day later that year.

The absolute torment that went through his chest when he opened it could almost rival the pain he felt when he awoke alone in the hospital, slowly realizing that Jack hadn’t made it out alive.

When he opened the envelope though, Gabriel was met with the headers; Note of Resignation.

It had been Jack’s. The date on the paper had surprised him even more than the resignation had. Zurich would have been Jack’s last day as Strike Commander for Overwatch.

Flipping to the next page Gabriel’s eyebrows pinched in confusion.

It was a document with granted leave for four weeks. In his name.

And sure enough, flipping to the next page had produced a confirmation of two tickets, first class to Exuma.

The next page a lease for a bungalow.

The last; a handwritten note from Ana.

_Dear Gabriel,_  
_His exact words were;_  
_For Gabriel._

_He did this for you because he loved you more than anything else in this world._

_I can only hope that your rage and jealousy didn’t cloud your love for him, Gabriel._

_He deserves to be honored._

_Prove him right, because he never gave up on your love._

_Not even in your darkest hours._

_Take care of yourself!_

_~ Love Ana_

  
Gabriel had collapsed on the floor by their bed, feeling lightheaded. The note was short and provided nothing but the older woman’s wisdom.

Gabe knew that Ana would never lie to him; it simply wasn’t in the older woman. Not to family.

How was he supposed to carry on after that? After he knew what Jack had done for him? For them.

He had felt so unloved, so...left behind and forgotten. Jack had never had time to spend with him. Gabriel usually went to bed alone and woke up alone more times than not.

Jacks' job as strike commander had taken every waking hour from him and not once had Gabriel felt like Jack fought to be with him.

He had felt like one of those trophy wives, some good eye-candy to hang on Jack's arm.

But looking back on it now, Gabriel knew that his pride had clouded everything. It wasn't really the suspension that bothered him. It was the feeling of being taken for granted by the man he loved more than his own life.

The feeling of being left behind, when they'd gone through so much together.

Gabriel had later put the documents and Ana’s note in framed pictures and hung them on their bedroom wall serving as a constant reminder of his failure.

Of his broken vows.

*

Shaking his head of the sad memories, he looked down at his left hand, smiling softly at the two wedding bands on his finger. Happy that he had this small part of Jack left, and silently; for the umpteenth time since the explosion, thanking whoever for finding Jack's wedding band in the ruins of the headquarters.

Rolling the two bands around his ring finger, his heart soared softly as he remember the words engraved on the inside of them.

Gabriel let out a heavy puff of air before walking towards the truck. It would be a long drive to Arlington, so he best get on moving.

Turning the keys in the ignition, he noted that the truck was half empty. This old thing burned gas like crazy, but that was alright. People got their own ways of coping and Gabriel guessed Jack's old truck was his.

As the truck roared to life, the same old country station that when Jack had left it, filled the cabin. Some old sad tune playing away, but Gabriel couldn’t for the life of him catch the words that were sung.

He cranked it up anyway and rolled all the windows down as he pulled out on the road leading up to the farm.

*

A couple of hours later, Gabriel had to pull over when Jack’s favorite song came on.

He sat on the shoulder just listening to the song blaring out of the old speakers, tears falling from his eyes, rolling fat and heavy down his cheeks.

Gabe gave a startled snort as he imagined that Jack would have probably punched his arm right now if he had seen him crying over a simple song, teasing him mercilessly about how emotional he was.

“You always were overly emotional, Gabe. It was one of the things I loved the most about you.” Gabriel heard Jack say beside him. A cut off sob escaped his throat as fresh tears tore away from his red-rimmed eyes once again.

He dared a small glance at the man sitting in the passenger seat, but quickly screwed his eyes shut as he leaned forward to rest his head on the steering wheel.

“Not now, Jackie. Please.” Gabriel begged him, the words barely above a whisper as he curled in on himself the best he could.

“Alright. I’ll see you soon though. Drive carefully, my king.” Jack said as he leaned over and softly kissed Gabriel’s forehead before drifting off.

Gabriel let a out ragged breath, clutching his chest as it constricted painfully, unaware that he had been holding his breath.

It was getting worse…

Shaking his head and wiping the tears from his face, Gabe pulled out on I-70 once more and let his thoughts flow.

He should probably visit his family and Jack’s parents after he came back home again. Gabe’s parents still lived in LA, but after those three first years, Jack’s parents had signed the farm over to him and moved to Florida to retire.

Maybe they had hoped that keeping Jack’s childhood home up and buzzing would keep Gabriel alive, hell it had done just that for the past five years.

The same hands that worked on the farm when Jack was alive, still worked with him today, wanting to help Gabriel with the farm. Even Jack’s siblings had happily signed the farm over to Gabe, not minding that Jack and him had basically been divorced for a year before Jack’s death.

A chill snaked its way down Gabriel’s spine at the mere thought of it. He had never once strayed from Jack, not even as their fighting got to the point where they couldn’t be in the same room.

_It hadn’t been from the lack of propositions though, far from it. As things got worse between them, guys would come up to Gabe to ask him out, either for a good time or more._

_Gabe had reacted the same way every time until they stopped asking, word going around that he would beat the living shit out of whoever was brave enough to approach him._

_He would remain Jack’s until the day he died, never having touched anyone but him. He could only pray that Jack had felt the same way, even when they were at their worst._

 

Gabriel thought back to the absurd week he had just had. It had been filled with meetings and lawyers visiting the farm. Making a new will was apparently serious business where a big farm was concerned. The lawyer had seemed confused when he had been ordered not to contact Jesse for any reason beside Gabriel’s death. He had poked and asked questions until Gabe had growled, a sad ghost of his previously authoritative self.

But the lawyer had relented with the questions, following every wish that Gabriel had and after what had seemed like ages, the new will was finalized.

Gabe had bought his one way ticket to Zurich two weeks from today, no hotel room was needed for this trip. It had been no easy decision to make, but Gabriel couldn’t take the pain anymore.

The hallucinations were becoming worse, much worse. More frequent. More……lifelike.

Though the hardest thing Gabriel had to face was the letter he had to leave for Jesse. He knew the other man would be mad, that he on some level wouldn’t understand.

But as Gabriel had tried to write the words down on the piece paper before him, he'd felt at a loss as to what to say.

He ended up giving a clinical explanation as to why he had done what he was about to do, assuring Jesse that everything had been taken care of. He added words of praise for the man that Jesse had become, words of love and pride. He wished Jesse and Hanzo all the happiness in the world and left the letter with a simple; Love always, Gabriel.

Sighing tiredly, Gabe turned into the hotel where he had rented a room for two nights. He was tired and hungry, but most of all, he dreaded the morning when he had to face Jack.

‘Should he lie to him or tell him the truth?’

No, Gabriel was done lying to Jack. Months of lying to the Strike Commander had made it a habit, a stab of defiance towards the other man.

Try as he might, Gabe couldn't help but muster up the last memory he had of Jack. His face haunting him every day since that day.

_Jack and Gabe had once again arguing, this time in the lower levels of the Zurich headquarters._

_Their voices had roared through the huge room as they hurt each other with the most stabbing words they could think of._

_Jack had his back to the door and didn’t see the flash of light coming towards them. Their arguing had just come to a peak, their anger burning so bright that it threatened to become more, to go where Gabriel had once gone._

_But as Gabe saw the flash of light coming for them, he sprinted forwards in an attempt to get Jack to safety, arm reaching out for him as he screamed Jack’s name, rage still etched into his face._

_The last thing Jack saw before he died was Gabriel’s angry face screaming as he reached out for him._

 

_And Jack, Jack had simply just closed his eyes._

 

Gabriel fell asleep on the bed with tears streaking his face, now more than ever dreading the morning that was to come.

*

Gabriel hadn’t slept much the previous night, mind plagued by memories of Jack.

Flicking on the Tv to the morning news, he walked into the adjoining bathroom to take a shower. The news spewing propaganda about yet another vigilante, the soldier.

_'These vigilantes...'_ he thought sourly, all too well remembering Jack's idealistic mindset.

Gabe sighed and shook his head as the warm water rushed down his body, the heat helping his pains and aches. He might have showered a bit longer than he usually did, so sue him, he was tired.

As he walked out of the shower, Gabriel caught the reflection of himself in the bathroom mirror and almost gasped.

Here in the privacy of the bathroom, naked without anything to shield his thin body from his own eyes, he almost didn’t recognize the man that stood before him.

He was sickly thin, so painfully thin. His hip bones protruding, his abdomen caving inwards, his rib-cage sorely visible beneath the thin skin. Skin that looked muddy and grey instead of the rich and golden hue it normally should have had.

His face was the worst though. Eyes sunken in with dark bags under them, beard so ungracefully unkempt, his cheeks sunken in, his hair long and wild with curls.

A warm arm suddenly snaked its way around his waist and Gabe stiffened.

‘Not now.’ he begged silently as he screwed his eyes shut, hoping that it would make the hallucination of Jack go away, knowing fully well that it wouldn’t.

“You need to eat more, Gabi.” Jack’s rough voice whispered in his ear as he rested his head on Gabe’s shoulder.

“Open your beautiful eyes for me.” He whispered shortly after.

Gabriel just screwed his eyes shut even harder, knowing fully well how dull they had become. Not at all how the other man remembered them.

He didn’t want to disappoint Jack even more than he already had though, so after a little while, Gabriel opened his eyes and stared at their reflection in the mirror.

A pained sob escaped Gabriel’s lips as the picture in the mirror registered in his mind.

There Jack stood tall, broad and full of muscles, looking as good and vibrant as always. His arm snaked tightly around Gabe’s abdomen, blue eyes staring at him from his shoulder as the owner smiled at him, making the crows-feet by his eyes dance softly.

“There’s my beautiful king.” Jack said lovingly, rubbing the side of his head against Gabe’s, almost purring. It felt so real. So painfully real. It never was though.

“I have to go, Jackie. I’ll see you soon.” Gabriel said hastily, moving away from the mirror before suddenly stopping and looking into the mirror again.

“I love you…” he whispered brokenly at the reflection of Jack, still smiling at him.

He snorted to himself as he turned his back to the mirror and walked into the bedroom.

‘You’re an idiot, Gabe. A stupid old fool! Talking to a hallucination like that.’

Gabriel shook his head as the embarrassment settled low on his cheeks. The news had shifted over to another topic by now, a topic that made the hairs on Gabriel’s arms stand to attention.

**Overwatch had been recalled.**

Gabe hurried to turn the TV off.

“That fucking monkey!” Gabriel swore angrily under his breath as he got dressed.

He left the hotel and drove towards Arlington, towards Jack. His temper rapidly subsiding the closer he got.

Unsteady hands went to open the door of the truck after he had parked. Gabriel suddenly didn’t want to do this anymore. Too nervous even though he knew nothing would come of it.

Jack was gone, had been dead for the past eight years. Well….two weeks short of eight years to be exact.

Taking a deep breath, Gabriel stepped out of the truck and let his feet guide him to the place where Jack rested, where Jack’s body should have rested had he not burn…

Gabe didn’t let himself finish that sentence, instead he walked a bit faster.

*

Gabriel plopped down in front of Jack's gravestone with no finesse. He sighed heavily as he looked up into the clear blue sky, before mustering enough courage to look down at the name etched into the cold smooth stone.

"Cómo has estado, rubito?" [How have you been, blondie?]  
Gabriel chokes out, voice breaking immediately upon uttering the words.

His left hand came up to shield his eyes as the sting of tears threatened to spring free. He immediately felt the cold and unforgiving surface of the two wedding bands against the bridge of his nose, breaking his control on the tears threatening to spill.

His chest constricted around the small broken sobs that passed through his lips. He felt his body collapsing onto Jack's stone, the cold smooth surface hitting the side of his head hard.

The small pang of pain was almost a welcoming feeling compared to the numbness that had been his life for the past eight years. In all honesty, it still amazed him that his body was able to produce more tears.

His hand fell from his eyes and landed upon Jack's engraved name, he sniffled, caressing each letter as he cried silently, heartbroken.

"This will be the last time we see each other in this world, Jack. I met with the attorney last week and signed the new will.” Gabriel whispered.

“I think Jesse will be happy back home, don't you? Heh, he might even convince Hanzo to settle down with him." He continued in a low raspy voice.

Picturing the Japanese native living on a farm in Bloomington, Indiana,always brought a small smile to Gabriel’s lips. Jesse was a good boy, he'd do good by Hanzo.

"They're coming over tomorrow night,must be over halfway by now. They couldn't catch an earlier flight, but that's alright, I've got time." Gabe whispered the last part.

Gabriel lay on Jack's grave, just talking nonsense with the other man for hours, retelling old memories, new happenings. But as the sun started to set and the beautiful blue skies begun to change color, Gabriel's tears started falling again.

"I drive your truck, you know." He said as he caressed the smooth stone beside his head.

If he tried hard enough, he could almost muster the memory of laying on Jack's chiseled chest. Except.... the flat stone was cold. Hard and unforgiving. It was nothing like the ray of sunshine what used to be his husband.

"I hope you don't mind, Jack." Gabriel choked as the sobs fell out of him, tears streaming down his face and blurring his vision completely.

"I love you so much, mi amado!" [my beloved]  
Gabe nuzzled his face into the engraved name and kissed each letter goodbye.

It would be good, he told himself. It would be good to let go of the constant pain he was in.

But as he kissed the last letter of Jack's name, heavy boots walked up behind him. A distinct vacuum pressure sound appeared after the person had stopped, a heavy object hitting the ground along with something larger.

Gabriel sighed heavily as he wiped the tears staining his face.

'Guess he didn't have that much time after all.' He thought sadly, grateful for getting the chance to say goodbye to Jack one last time. Grateful that he wouldn't have to pull that trigger himself.

"Gabriel...?" said the person behind him, voice gravely rough and oddly uneven, as if the person had genuinely trouble speaking them.

Gabe's spine went stiff and a cold shudder raced through his body.

‘It couldn't be.’ He screamed to himself.

‘It couldn't!’

But the voice that called his name was as familiar to him as every cell in his body. He had dreamed of hearing that voice calling his name once more. Longed for it for the past eight years.

Gabriel huffed an almost offended snort as he screwed his eyes closed.

‘One last stab to his already miserable life, huh? Well done, Gabriel, well-fucking-done.’ He sneered to himself, shaking his head. This wasn't the first time he had imagined hearing that voice, but it would be the last.

The man crashed heavily to the ground behind him and Gabriel could feel the heat rolling of off him. It felt so real this time.

Gabriel felt fresh tears fall down his cheeks again as he hung his head, still shaking his head from side to side in denial, a broken sob escaping his lips unwillingly.

Life had a funny way of playing cruel tricks on a man already beaten and bloodied, Gabe though sourly.

"G-Gabriel. My king, my heart... Look at me? Please... look at me." the man behind him begged with a raspy, broken voice.

Gabe jumped when a soft but solid hand landed carefully on his shoulder. He couldn’t help but curled in on himself as he let his sobs flow freely from his re-breaking heart.

This was just too real for him to overcome. He felt lightheaded, unable to breathe.

Two strong arms wound tightly around him, lifting his now too lite body up before depositing him sideways into a warm and solid lap. The arms wrapping around him again as one hand found its way into Gabe's wild curls, softly pushing his head to rest on the man's broad chest, his square chin resting softly on top of Gabriel’s head.

The man rocked them slowly, whispering words that Gabriel doesn't understand. They sit like that for a long time, until Gabriel is exhausted and the tears have stopped falling all together.

The man smells so painfully familiar, smells like home and Gabriel finally dares to lift his head to look at the man he had believed long gone.

His hair is a cold silvery white now, his hairline resided considerably since the last time Gabriel saw him.

Two long and deep scars marked his still beautiful face. The biggest one from his jaw, across the bridge of his nose that ended in the middle of his forehead, above his right eyebrow. The second scar crossed his beautiful lips, somehow enchanting them even more.

The man was older, but as Gabriel mapped every detail of the man's face, hands shaking slightly as they reached up to touch his face, he had to admit to himself that he had never seen anything... anyone as beautiful as the man before him.

"Jack..." Gabriel whispered as the man in question leaned his face into his hand and kissed it softly as his red rimmed cloudy blue eyes finally meet Gabriel’s and he smiled.

Gabriel is powerless to do anything else, so he instead smiles right back at the love of his life, softly laughing on broken sobs.

Their foreheads meet as they smile and stare into each other's eyes. Jack's un-gloved hand comes up to cup Gabriel's thin face and a second later, chapped, thin lips meet Gabriel’s in the most loving kiss they'd ever shared before.

“I'm here, Gabriel.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all enjoyed it!
> 
> There's now two amazing art pieces by Onesmollhurt/Jaspurrlock!  
>  Art #1
> 
> Art #2


End file.
